Tuesday, September 15, 2020

JOURNEYS

 MEMOIRS OF FRIENDSHIP JOURNEYS ON THE RIVER OF LIFE

 

The keepsake memento presented by Preeti with your loving notes was overwhelming. Thank you for the affection you share with me and family.

Renu struck the right note recollecting the babbling brook 'khal khal chal chal keheti sarita'..translated by Renu as 'yesterday yesterday, going going, says the river.' It was prescient of Renu to bring yesterday to now, as we have journeyed over terrain smooth and rough, yet flowing along in companionship, loving friendship.   

   


 



This is my favorite of Renu at her impromptu funny best in UK in May 2008. We had gone to see Goody. Goody convinced the Bishop to lend his large roomy van and recruited a nice gentleman to drive us around. It was a motoring holiday.

 

This photo was taken in the museum attached to Winchester Castle. Koo spied the bodice, overlooked the DO NOT TOUCH SIGN, and fastened it around herself. She looked stunning, we looked on in awe and fear that we might be arrested. 



A rare moment of the Panday sisters catching up. Both are extremely popular and surrounded by all of us us. This was the morning we arrived in Lisbon Portugal, in April 2016. Alfama is a beautiful location with steep climbs and narrow cobbled roads. We huffed and puffed with our bags, and vola, into our Airbnb taht Fareda had sourced. Later that evening Ana and Arvind visited with wine and cheese.      

 

I arrived in Lisbon after making a stop in Dublin to pray at Goody's grave. It was lovely to meet Sr. Ria at Limerick and spend the day with her. 

 

Portugal is beautiful, and extra special because of Ana and Arvind and their warm hospitality.  I will come to that in a bit. First, the drama. There is always drama in every trip.

 


This time it was Kalpana. She had a bad fall, and cut her lip right after this photograph. Fortunately Fareda is the finest doctor to have. She attended to Kalpana, and staunched the bleeding. 

Many of you credit me with organising the trips. It is not so. Behind every happy memorable trip, there is Fareda, super efficient, purse holder, tech provider, and person in charge. Everyone can relax, because 'hamare pass Fareda hai."

Back to Portugal and indulgence, see what I mean from day 1. Arvind proposed a a plan for sightseeing, and we set off to explore. 


  

I had forgotten Ana & Renu had a private room, as did Jaya Bum & I.

 


See what I mean about indulgence, Vibha is just our poster girl as we all hogged our way through Pasties de Nata and shuddered through an evening of Fado.

Arvind & Ana invited us to their beautiful elegant home. Ana prepared a feast in her new super hi tech one pot gadget. We ate off beautiful hand painted ceramic plates that Ana had worked on and mastered the craft. Incredible care in workmanship. And to round off the visit, Arvind pulled out his guitar , and we sang along with Arvind strumming "Kookaburra sits on the old gum tree" and "Count your Many blessings"    







 





This angelic lady is a disappearing artist. We lost her in Lisbon, in Pondicherry, & I think in Rishikesh also. In Lisbon it was a major turmoil, as we raced up and down to locate her. But her act was mild compared to the class drama queen Deenaz in Pondicherry.    




On drama, the scariest was in 2010, immediately on arriving in Ireland. Goody as usual had fixed us in a lovely B&B Argus House, run by Ann. I have been there twice after and it's most comfortable. 

Anyway we had planned to go over to Goodys community after we had settled in and have lunch with her. We took the bus, and got off at the stop Goody had told us. Excitedly we hugged and kissed her, when Sarla discovered her purse was left behind in the bus, money, passport, tickets. Golly.  


Goody swung into action. Her neighbors were in the police, they were finishing Sunday lunch. She explained the emergency. They spoke on walkie talkies. We waited at the bus stop. The bus arrived on its return run. The police held it up, Sarla rushed in, and her bag was lying where she had left it. Huge relief and prayer of gratitude. 

As it was 2010, and it was our 60th, Goody had arranged a huge cake and crowns for us to wear. Almitra did the same for us at Rishikesh a decade later!



Ireland is breathtaking in serenity, and beauty. 



It was an incredible visit, great food, lavish hospitality at every restaurant & pub whether at Brazen Head established in 1198 or Johnnie Fox outside Dublin, with Renu applying for bartender. Bet you have forgotten Koo!










Vibha is very good at making suggestions for travel. When she was India in 2012, she proposed a trip, and we zeroed in on Ooty. Fareda could not join, she was a grandma. 

Remember the drama? Here it was Neena Gokul, who arrived in Coimbatore a month ahead. She called me from Coimbatore Airport, & I missed her call. Next call to Renu. 

"Hello Renu, Neena here. Where are you folks?"

"Hi Neena, I'm in Mumbai."

"You are not joining us? I'm in Coimbatore already."

Penny dropped for Renu. Very calmly she told Neena, "We are meeting in July Neena. This is June. Stay the night in a hotel, and return to Mumbai." Renu with  great presence of mind besides witty quips, saved the day.  

Neena is the least dramatic person, and she replied, "Thank you Renu. I must have been mistaken." She stayed in a hotel, returned next day to Mumbai, and joined us in Coimbatore the next month. Bravo Neena!

The visit started with a lunch stop at Leah's beautiful home in Coimbatore. Leah is Renu's niece, a super woman, who laid out a banquet. 



       



We stayed at the Ooty Club, also called the English Club booked by Indu Chary, with fireplace stacked with wood chips, butlers, and dinning room service, course by course. French onion soup came in good old soup plates, cutlets with home made french fries, and perfect poached eggs.  

Indu saw that we had a stirring reunion at school, with full assembly & then a walk through the woods. A lot has changed, but with evergreen memory, we relived our moments.........

   




Assembly Hall


                                                 Back Playground



                              1966 Class Gift to School. Remember him!


                           
Reunion with Seniors and Juniors Madhvani. Lady on right Amal, Renus sister and part of Nazareth reunions since  




                                 Early Bird Best friends from class 2


                            

                                                 At Ooty Club 





   Bum's father was how I came to Nazareth, and we stayed dearest of friends. 

 


MY FRIEND JAYA 

            I had known Jaya since our infancy; she was a year younger, my brother’s age. My father and Jaya's father had joined the company together and were friends. It was Jaya's father who mentioned the boarding school Nazareth in Ooty and the next year I was enrolled in the same class as Jaya. We were young children and I took comfort in
her friendship when I was thrust into the strange world of boarding schools and though we shared a family connection and a similar tongue it was our personal equation that bound us together.
        Jaya and I were poles apart; she was gentle, I boisterous; she was diligent in her application, I was irreverent; she spoke softly while my laugh rattled the corridors. Our classmate Ruth writes from Bangalore, "About Jaya I should like to recall her gentleness, sweet disposition, strong sense of her own duty which did not, as often happens, becomes an occasion to judge others. It seems such a cruel shame that a person like her should suffer and be taken away so soon, from a world which can ill spare such people."
    We were both vegetarians, a small minority in school and we struggled gamely with helpings of fruit, bread, butter and puddings. I was short and plump while Jaya grew lanky and tall moving to the end of the class line. Ana our classmate from Portugal writes," her memory is fresh in my mind. She was so thin you would
hardly imagine Jaya passing away after a heart attack!
” And Almitra from
UK says," So sorry to hear this sad news. I remember Jaya as being a soft
spoken, quiet, very slim young girl. What happened? Was she ill? Oh dear, I do feel very weepy. This is no age to die."

   When we went to senior school Jaya and I petitioned Mother Good Counsel to
allot a private room to us claiming kinship. We are cousin sisters, we stated so please give us a private room. The sisters were not deceived but believed Jaya would be a sobering influence on me and we had our own room. This was priceless good fortune as I mended my slipshod ways and kept my side tidy. Jaya and I did many things together though she did not take part in sports or in the clandestine midnight reading of novels. But she was so circumspect that I got away with three years of blissful
reading.
    Jaya had a good sense of fun and a sense of humour. She had a sweet smile that played on her lips and when she laughed tears welled up in her eyes. She loved watching English movies and our letters to each other during holidays were full of the films we had seen.
    In our Form V which was the 10th Std., Sr. Ria the Principal called a few of us into her office. We were to sit for the ISC exam and not the Matriculation which was the School Board Exam. Our Class was spilt with Jaya and me along with Vibha, Minnie, Ruth and Gita studying for the ISC. It was harrowing and Jaya gave me lots of encouragement as I had chosen science subjects without a solid foundation.
       Miss Indu Chary taught us Hindi and Ms Padmini took English. Indu lives in
Ooty and Padmini in USA and she had met Jaya a few years ago in Hyderabad
with Sarla another classmate. Padmini writes, "I am in shock! I recall meeting her with Saral and recall that she helped us connect up with her brother-in-law who was an Oncologist. She was so caring and so helpful. I did not know that she had a health problem. May her soul rest in peace!"
    Renu was the poet laureate of our class. She wrote a classic on all of us in 1964. Here are a few lines from her poem ‘Famous Form Four’:
J.   Is for Jaya who uses her brain
K.  Is for Khiljits who had a short reign.

    Renu, Preeti, Fareda , Neena  of our class are all in touch and we
have spoken very fondly about Jaya. Lalitha, Prema and Chumi all send
their prayers and condolences to the family.
       My family and I have been meeting Jaya, Gopal and Ananth though not as often as both of us would have liked. We made plans to meet at Dehra Doon, Pune etc
but something always came up. Though I had wanted to attend Ananth’s wedding in Vijayawada, I couldn’t and it was Preeti who was there and gave me all the happenings. A couple of years ago, Jaya took Neena and me to lunch in Hyderabad. As always she was wearing a crisp pastel cotton sari and we chatted so easily about our families, our aches and pains and our small fears and anxieties.
       I was in Jaslok Hospital with my daughter who was recovering from a bad accident, and I was talking about Jaya and her cheerful positive spirit that I saw when I visited her in the Hyderabad hospital room in May. Even as I was speaking my cell lit up and I glanced at it to see Jaya's name flashing. It was Gopal to tell me that my friend was no more.
        I think Jaya was bidding me farewell when I started to talk of her out of the blue in that hospital room 800 km from Hyderabad. I came across my old diary and found this entry for Tuesday, May 25, 1965. This is what I had written of that summer day in Ooty.
    “9.30 and out with Jaya and her mum. We first went to their house and looked at
mags etc. Then we saw the neighbour’s baby and played with it for some
time. We had orange squash and played about till lunch. After lunch we
rested and then dressed for the pictures. The lunch was lovely and
everything was home like. There were many kinds of pickles and I liked
the lunch. The picture was called ' Court Jester' with Danny Kaye.

    Jaya and I shared a friendship that was so ordinary, quiet and open
filled with warm affection for each other. We also shared an understanding of spirituality, to be in touch with one's core.
    Spirituality and Love is how I treasure my friend.

 October 10, 2013



              Vibha, as I mentioned suggests the meets. In 2019, She was visiting India, and asked, shall we meet. I airily replied of course, and suggested Pondicherry. Almitra was visiting Mumbai, and Deenaz too confirmed baba. So early Feb 2019, The Mumbai party arrived in Chennai to visit Pondicherry. 

         Thank you for your words of appreciation of your home stay with me in Chennai. I have enjoyed the home stay with all of you several times over in full measure, the last being at Renu's as a stopover in Mumbai to Rishikesh. She treated me to a beautiful evening of readings at NCPA, called The Bose Letters. It was magical and an advance gift from her for the 70th. 

       Back to Chennai, and Mumbai party with dormitory stay. Vibha had earlier stayed with me in 2012 for the Ooty trip and knew her way around my place.  

 

 



For breakfast, Almitra had her favourite uppama, and we started for Pondy in a nice large van without any schedule. Our first halt was Dakshin Chitra and then lunch at Fisherman's Cove sitting on the beach front. 




We arrived in Pondichery after several stops for tea, snacks, etc, only to discover the town in an uproar over something. Fareda had excruciating back pain and did not mutter a word. So we thought, that is our drama, and settled in for a good nights rest. How wrong. 

As we drove through the streets of Pondy and sightseeing, Deenaz announced her agarbatti supplier, was in Pondy. She mentioned a street, and we passed it. "Stop" shouted Deenaz, "I must visit the shop." Gamely Renu offered to escort her while we sat in the van. Half hour later they returned. "His shop has moved, I got his number baba, and he will pick me up from Casablanca. Best agarbatti I have used." Renu rolled her eyes and said " We walked up and down, and someone asked what we were looking for. Fortunately he had the phone number." 

Anyway we went to Casablanca which is a department store run by the Hidesign Group. Deenaz was waiting for the man to pick her up, Renu close at her heels. A youngish man drove up  on a scooter and rang Deenaz who waved at Renu, sat on the bike and drove off.  Renu was froozen, and then came rushing in and announced," Deenaz has gone off on a bike with a man."   

Please imagine the rest.....

Being Valentine Day and we had booked at a fancy French place for a fine evening. It was a disaster, with Deenaz ready to swoon, weak from hunger, and crying for a Coke to revive her. There is no drama queen quite like Deenaz baba.   


Deenaz thirsting for Coke


We had a lovely visit to Auroville Centre and walked to Matri Mandir. Almitra tried  her hardest to get lost , and nearly did, but we held on to her tight . After the bad experience on Valentines night, we had lovely lunch and dinner at two beautiful places. 



A lovely walk to Matri Mandir





March 2020 The Glass House on the Ganges, Rishikesh  



Renu treated us to a birthday lunch.It was Yum. And more you saw in the album crafted by Preeti as our 70th year keepsake!




Sixty years ago, we clambered on to a tiny sturdy raft called Nazareth. Each of us carried away a piece of that raft, and fashioned our own boats to voyage on life's course. There were storms and high winds, calm seas and balmy landscapes, we built our own families, others came on board, some left. 

By divine Grace, we stayed connected, and found the opportunity to reconnect from time to time. Rested and happy from our vacation bubble, we returned contentedly to our boats.    

There is a saying, " A chain is only as strong as its weakest link." I think we Nazarenes can say "A relationship chain is only as strong as its links of friendship."

A toast to "70's of Friendship." 


Much much love

Sue

Thursday, January 4, 2018

Incredible Transformation


To visit the Passport Seva Kendra is to experience Transformation, capital T.

The metro is a new system running parallel with Bus,Train, Auto, Rickshaws, Trams, etc. Passport Seva Kendra is like the Ship of Theseus.

This was my sixth visit to a passport office the last in 2008. The Passport Seva Kendra in Saligram, Chennai took my breath away.

The building is not sheet glass.
The Staff are uniformed
There is no fanfare.
There are no touts, no chaos, no jostling crowd.
In one hour I am processed by the TCS staff initially and then the Government Officials in the last two segments.
Every applicant has a waiting area to sit. The security, staff, and official are quick, smart, pleasant.
This is far superior to the experience of any visa application.
I cannot say if this is because of Digital India, Training, Private- Public Partnership Exercise, or the change initiated by the Ministry of External Affairs.

It was a pleasure and comfort to have this experience.I can only say Namaste.

Tuesday, December 26, 2017

Its All About Love




               The two light tan in front are mum and daughter. Rear Jimmy, and Brownie to far left.


End of the year, a crisis, a celebration, or a routine day, is as good as any other to see life simply, without filters of prejudice, blinds of perception, myopia of insular thinking.
I read profound declarations by serious practitioners of living life right, yet many seem to miss the simplicity of just caring and sharing.
This story is about a family of native Indian dogs that live next to my house. Mum had a daughter and then Jimmy, who is now six months.
Mum and daughter were taken to be spayed. Jimmy missed his mother's body and howled for two nights. Then Brownie moved in and took care of Jimmy and cuddled him.
On Sunday, mum and daughter returned and found Brownie on their territory. Jimmy was ecstatic and frisked, while the girls sniffed him around. Reassured they allowed Brownie to hang out with them.
Here the four are off to have a fun morning. All one family.

Wednesday, December 6, 2017

HOMECOMING 2017


Of  The Class of 1972

Where should I start? With the bugle call for the reunion in Goa? Or the plan to converge in Jamshedpur for Homecoming 2017. It doesn’t matter and the numbers in attendance matter even less. I know and sense that the entire strength of IR & BM ’72 were with Aquil, Gopi, Bodi and myself, with Dot and Pooja in the state of the art campus.   

You have read and seen the photographs from three of our distinguished classmates: Aquil, Gopi and Bodi. In my story, you will savour the visit to XL from a chatty narrative.There was considerable nostalgia on the loss of Fr. McGrath, a universally loved Teacher, Mentor and Friend.   
                                                      


                                                         The new Logo


                                                    The Portals to Learning
                                                    For the Greater Good 


I like the idea of benefitting the Community and Society. It recalls Gandhi's advice to Nehru on taking decisions. Most thought Gandhi was weird in his ideas of simplicity. The problem was that the sophisticates made bigger blunders.   
                                              
                                                   Vision and Values 


Prof Ray welcoming the Alumni

Fr.Dr. Abraham , Director of XLRI 


It was enthusing to hear Fr. Abraham share the growth plans for XL We can expect new campuses in Delhi NCR by 2019, addition of 3 campus of XIME. The XL map will be something by 2022.

The old Campus was cute and compact like all of us. The new Campus is bold and assertive with co ed Accommodation, An International Centre, And State of the Art Learning Centre.  

                                                          Co-ed Hostel, Learning Centre, International Centre


                                                      Jitu walking up


The facilities are excellent. The dinning hall and several party rooms for smaller groups. 

The Reunion Lunch was at the Diamond Jubliee Park on Campus and not to be confused with Jubliee Park. It was bright and festive, with Aquil and Bodi in great demand with the students, hoping to get some gyan. 
Aquil used a novel technique. He would accost a young thing or lad with his large Nikon with telescopic lens on. The youngster flattered and flustered would put out his hands. Aquil would place the camera in them and direct the photo shoot with many tips to the hapless photographer. Bodi prowled about for platters of desert while Gopi, Dot, Pooja and I chatted at our table. 
  

As you heard there were several awards for distinguished Alumni. Our own Dr. Aquil Busrai had received the Lifetime Acheivement Award in 2015. In the ranks of Joe Phillip and Mr Muthuraman. 
This is Arjun Chatterjee who is an Awardee. He wished to get a pic with me, and that was my brush with the celeb of the day!
The Alumni in the middle is Sanjiv Sen who received an Award.   

I found Aquil's pursuit of his Phd fascinating. He spoke of his special relationship with his guide, data collection and writing his thesis. Aquil mentioned the support he had from Madhukar shukla and the Institute. He described his final presentation to the Panel, how the Chief kept grilling him. Later after he had been awarded his honorofic, the Chief said told him how tough it was for him to grill Aquil dressed nattily in a suit while the panel sat in shirt sleeves. I have urged Aquil to complete the experience and bring out his thesis as a book. Aquil is a much sought out prof at Ranchi, Berkley etc.Wow!

Another scholar is Gopi and all of you would have heard of his work with rural empowerment. In my view Gopi should be awarded the Magsaysay Award. His work across India at the Gram Sabha level is unbelievable. You can imagine his shy smile as he reluctantly disclosed 12000 trainers working under him. Wow! Dorothy, Dot as I know her, remains the same affectionate gentle person with a kind word for everyone. Saw snaps of her two beautiful granddaughters.   

Bodi is a Corporate Encyclopedia and a Master Of Printing and Inks. Not just the business end, the chemical, alloys, and all production elements involved. On the train to Jamshedpur, we had Umesh Singal an IITian and Jamshedpur nivasi in our section. Umesh was floored how Bodi described testing done for him at IIT Mumbai, where Bodi had to guide them on a huge state of art printing press TOI was going to invest in. Remarkable. Very briefly I met Bodi's wife and daughter who came to see him off at Howrah Station. 

It was uncanny how Bodi came up to me at Howrah platform and took me in a bear hug, before I said Jack Robinson. He told my daughter he recognised me from the orange bindi I wore even at XL. A detail like that after 45 years floors me. 

A significant highlight for me was presenting my two books to Fr. Abraham for the Institute Library. 


Jamshedpur township is still green, clean. The station area has metamorphed into a smart one. Bistapur is the same with Boulevard Hotel and Regal Cinema one end. Now the market goes upto Ram Mandir. Natraj is a dump, Madras Hotel is Modern, World Bank closed, and plenty of eateries in Contractors Area. The TMH Hospital is huge. There is a DAV school now and plenty of private flat residences.

Circuit House area too is same with Dhar Roy's House a marker. Many houses have made way for modern places like the Naiks. 

I missed a visit to Fakira. And I compensated for it at Balram Mullick on Park Street, stuffing myself with Singadas and Rasagollas much to Walter's horror since I then had some tasty hakka noodles at Silver Grill. Surprise...as Pooja & I sat in Silver Grill chatting with Walter, in walked Bodi's wife and daughter. We left, gorged on singads and returned, they left, and Bodi arrived. Poor Walter had a Mad Hatters Lunch party. 
Walter told Pooja all about poor blushing Sudhas Roy embarassed when I spoke to him. It was great to meet Walter, enjoy his hospitality, topped with a humungous box of Bengali Sweets, speak with Norma and wish them the best for the Weddiing in January. The young couple looks handsome together at the pastoral civil wedding in Australia.   
     

Calcutta, Kolkata is beautiful and dignified. This time of the year it is charming with the flowers, the nip in the air, the bustle on Park Street, clean roads, well lit streets. Didi has transformed the city. Do visit Meera Basu for exquiste Bengali Handloom saris. 

I went to Belur Math and it was tranquil with the barages and boats going up and down Ganga.  


Wishing everyone of you the best in the years ahead. A joyous New Year 2018 to you and yours. 

Suraksha 
Ernest Writer, Struggling Author.